The Gustavian Weekly

Calendar (2-22-13) | The Gustavian Weekly

By Justin Feit Calendar Editor | February 22, 2013 | Calendar

The Calendar Page is considered editorial. The opinions expressed herein are not the opinions of The GusTavian Weekly, but actually what’s in those emails we get at like 1 a.m. that I imagine no one reads.

Friday, Feb. 22

Faculty Shop Talk: Interpretive Center 4:30 p.m.

The Gustavus faculty knows their s@#$ about cars.

Weekend Movie: Rise of the Guardians: Wallenberg Auditorium 8 p.m.

The alternate title was Rise of the Adoptive Parents.

The Government Inspector: Anderson Theatre 8 p.m.

The Black Eyed Peas said they aren’t going because they “don’t want no drama, no no no no drama.”

Saturday, Feb. 23

GAC Idol Auditions: Alumni Hall and Aerobics Room 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

The ratings of GAC Idol have dipped since the British guy left.

The Government Inspector: Anderson Theatre 8 p.m.

The other play, The Anarchist Inspector, just doesn’t have the focus of this one.

Weekend Movie: Rise of the Guardians: Wallenberg Auditorium 8 p.m.

What’s with all of the animated movies, CAB? I’m an adult!

Sunday, Feb. 24

Weekend Movie: Rise of the Guardians: Wallenberg Auditorium 2 p.m.

Hopefully this movie isn’t sad. Hugh Jackman has met his make-you-cry movie quota already with Les Mis.

The Government Inspector: Anderson Theatre 2 p.m.

The conservatives called this play another liberal agenda of invasive government. I don’t think they got it.

Justin Feit’s 21st Birthday: All Over the World 12 a.m. to 11:59 p.m.

Oh, that’s weird. How did this get in here?

Monday, Feb. 25

Hispanic Film Festival Screening of Even the Rain: Wallenberg Auditorium 7 p.m.

The title is not lying; they literally bring rain water to dry places.

Tuesday, Feb. 26

Selling Your Language Skills: Culpeper Language Center 4 p.m.

Or for those with tattoos in Chinese, selling your bodies.

Wednesday, Feb. 27

Bruce Gray’s Black and Bold Book Discussion: St. Peter Banquet Room 3 p.m.

There’s going to be wine and cheese there? F@#$ Case Day, sign me up!

Good Food for Busy Gusties: St. Peter Co-op 6 p.m.

It’s definitely not at the Caf! Zing!

Thursday, Feb. 28

Step Aerobics: Lund 224 12:40 p.m.

I’d rather do some Elevator Aerobics.

Feit-sty Not Really Horoscopes

Aries: The other neighborhoods of New York are scrambling to make a dance that college students will do wrong.

Taurus: You are going to bring out the worst in GAC on Saturday.

Gemini: It looks like a lot of groups forgot about Window Painting based on the artistic quality this go-around.

Cancer: Someday Jack Black will get his due at the Oscars.

Leo: If nothing else, Michael Jordan needs to come out of retirement for Space Jam 2.

Virgo: Yes, if you are counting, that’s two Space Jam jokes in two weeks. Call me a sucker for classic cinema.

Libra: When people don’t know current events, you’re all like, “Syria-sly?”

Scorpio: With the inclusion of Jeffrey Tambor on CAB’s speaker list, Arrested Development fans at Gustavus blue themselves in excitement.

Sagittarius: Here’s to hoping Jennifer Lawrence kills her fellow nominees for the Oscar for Best Actress with a bow as a publicity stunt for Catching Fire.

Capricorn: Your Case Day strategy is the worst idea since the announcement of Girl Meets World.

Aquarius: Ohle is taking part in Case Day. He could really use a cold one—or twenty-four—these days.

Pisces: Are these even horoscopes anymore? No, they aren’t.