Voting changes nothing. Death is certain.
-Steve Palmer

As I put fingertip to keyboard to write this, it is five in the evening on what is supposed to be the most important day of every red-blooded American’s life. It is supposed to be the day that the America we know will be shattered into a million little pieces, and then interviewed by Oprah to find out how its happy childhood turned into acne-ridden adolescence, which then turned into a midlife crisis of democratic pluralism involving a number of polygamous affairs with several fickle interest groups who were only ever interested in it for its money.

But enough about sex. Sex is never certain. But death is. Health care is not certain. But death is. Taxes are uncertain. But death is the ultimate flat tax. Which party controls the legislature is not certain. But death for all, both Republicans and Democrats, is. And although they might like to think they are, independents are not exempt either.

We were told to vote with vigor, like we had never voted before. Did it change anything? Of course not. We will all still die someday. In spite of how prevalent this issue is, there is still no ballot initiative addressing that.

Voting changes nothing.

We were fooled. Fooled into thinking they could save us. We listened as they talked of freedom and of spending and of moving forward. We thought they could fix everything. But their so-called “progress,” their new laws and their new programs, are nothing more than cosmetic. The real problem still remains unsolved.

Death is certain.

Some naïve people talk of Scandinavia. It’s said that thanks to socialism they enjoy the best quality of life in the world. But has socialism addressed the single issue that impacts every single citizen in Scandinavia? It has not. Death is still certain. Socialism fail.

Some talk of China. They say the explosion of capitalism has allowed China to maintain an absurd of level of economic growth, and it will soon become the most powerful country in the world. But has an epic GDP made death any less certain for its 1.3 billion citizens? It has not. Capitalism—fail (slash communism double fail).

Voting changes nothing.
Death is certain.

We are supposed to be the lighthouse of the world. We are supposed to be a nation of doers, of innovators. You’d think more people would be holding their representatives responsible to deal with this issue. It is probably the most universal issue present in today’s America. The one that affects us all. Why should we support candidates who can’t even promise to take care of our one most basic concern? Health care reform is a Band-Aid. It only serves as a reminder that elected officials of both parties have failed time and time again to pass legislation that solves the issue of their constituents’ mortality.

This issue affects us all. It doesn’t matter whether you’re a Democrat, a Republican or a flake. Write your representative. Ask them why they seem so unconcerned about our inevitable mortality. Ask them what they have done to earn your vote. Tell them in spite of everything they claim to have done, you still expect to die one day. Tell them how you feel about raising your children in this environment. Tell them no more business as usual. Tell them it’s time for some real change. Dare them to deny this terrible truth:

Voting changes nothing. Death is certain.

(Credit goes to Steve Palmer, last year’s commentary editor, for landing upon the best way ever to defuse a political debate via Facebook thread. Steve died—I mean graduated—last year. But he will die someday. No matter how much he votes.)