Well gentlemen. I suppose you’re wondering why I’ve called you all here tonight. Please, have some cheese from the cracker platter. Gentlemen, I consider many of you to be my brothers. And when I say brothers, I really just mean really, really good friends. That’s why I think it’s time for us to expand as an organization. As you know, we are all awesome people. … Continue reading It comes with a free pin

Upon our traveling to the Renaissance Festival back in the wee beginning of October (remember that Weekly column?!), my suite-mate and I purchased a bar of handmade soap. After smearing our noses in the dozens of samples in the town-market-esque shoppe and chatting with the saleswoman (soap wench?) who had “free soap here” written on her chest with arrows pointing toward her cleavage, we decided … Continue reading Sexy, Satyr Soap

Recently, the first-year orientation process, in particular the shows The Inside Scoop and E Pluribus Gustavus, have been receiving intense public scrutiny. So as far as I can tell, the cause can be linked back to a socially-conservative blog post made by a senior Gustavus student who wrote about those shows using video clips he captured while viewing the performances. The videos are not raw … Continue reading What the first-years see at orientation

Recent events on campus pertain to the issue of homosexuality. Historically speaking, conflicts between and within faith communities are not something new on the map. Humans have been dealing with contradictions and alterations in traditions for, let’s see, centuries. That said, it is necessary to temporarily overlook this philosophical topic and objectively witness the way in which the discourse was ideated. Every community experiences conflict. … Continue reading Direct communication: Not just for comm majors

For people who have read my commentaries in the past, you know it is uncharacteristic of me to not only talk about things before they happen (I’m writing on 10/10/10) but also discuss what is a sensitive political issue in the campus community. I don’t wish to seem crass, but “gay rights” is only a political movement because it has to be, and I hope … Continue reading Since it’s Coming Out Week…

I am normally not one for board games. This probably stems from my standing as a middle child with two brothers, and thus I endured much torture and failure while trying to play such games with them. In Monopoly, I was the one who ended up with a single house on St. Charles Place after my brothers formed a joint ownership of all remaining properties, … Continue reading Friends, fellowship and Settlers of Catan

At the risk of feeding the flames of overreaction and self-righteousness, I want to talk this week about the Bible verse on The Rock. I don’t promise to add a fresh perspective, just one that comes from someone who considers himself to be a reasonable person, in spite of being a Lutheran. The Christian Bible has often been dismissed by non-Christians as being perfectly valid … Continue reading Get the hell out of my religion

Words. Arranged in few and sparse, they are all but for the worse. Smushed and squished like sardines in a can, these words overwhelm, confuse any woman. Hence—the length of a song suits me—a commentary, my cuppa tea! On that quippy note, I illustrate here on our imaginary chalkboard the word “Gustie” in all its splendor. What connotations mingle with that word? Smiles, hard workers, … Continue reading The powerful connotations of words

Mondays. Who invented them? …Why? Here at beloved Gustavus, we learn (hopefully) about the history of Western civilization and the development of our culture and perspective. If not, something’s up with where our money’s going. Since attending this hilltop haven, I’ve been blessed with a good handful of EXCELLENT MONDAYS! I beg of you, how does that happen? In my experience, it starts with a … Continue reading Mondays are not always horrible. They can be wonderful.