Taylor Storlien-

To the Editor,

Each week I read the horoscopes that are posted, but this week I found myself wondering: “What are those zodiac signs doing academically?” With Advising Day fresh on everyone’s minds, I thought I would share what each zodiac would major in, at least according to me. First up, we have Aries. Now to me, Aries are a bold and courageous bunch of people. They love leading a group rather than being in the group, which is why Exercise Physiology makes perfect sense to me. Aries is the type to lead your Intramural Volleyball team to victory, or to teach one of the fitness classes in Lund.

Next up is Taurus. Taurus is practical. Determined. Reliable. Environmental Studies is all three of these. With global warming ramping up, Environmental Studies is a very real major that affects everyone. ES majors know that they have to act now and do their part to help the world. It’s also fitting because they are an earth sign. 

Gemini. We all know them. We may not all love them. As a Gemini Rising, I feel like I can give Geminis a little grief about their reputation. Known for being the twins, a lot of people think that Geminis are “two-faced,” “fake,” or “indecisive.” It’s not their fault they have the twins as their symbol, it just means they are open to more opportunities! For everyone’s assumptions about them, Gemini is definitely Psychology. They are curious and sociable, and they just want to know how people function. 

Cancers are known for being extremely in touch with their emotions, being one of the more empathetic signs. They know just what to say when you’re feeling down, whether you might need advice or a shoulder to cry on. That’s why they would be the perfect Elementary Education major. Cancer was born to say “Hi Friends! Let’s try to be quiet during silent reading,” and they are naturally good at figuring out why a 6 year old might be having a tummy ache. It’s just what they do.

Confident and generous, charismatic and ambitious. There is really only one major that truly encapsulates all of the traits of a Leo: Communication Studies. Every comm studies person I have met has been super ambitious, wanting to lead a full career. That being said, these people don’t just leave you high and dry when you need something. They can lead a presentation with ease, and coordinate events no problem. Being a Leo means you have it all under control, and to me, that’s what Communication Studies is all about: navigating the world and being flexible to handle anything that enters your path. 

Now, here is where I am going to be a little more biased than I have been. As a Virgo woman myself, Virgo women rock! They pay close attention to detail, which makes creative projects so much more intricate and interesting. They are analytical and practical, which makes them great at research, especially when it comes to obscure topics. BUT I think many of us can agree that Virgo men are not *quite* as awesome. I have a complicated history with Virgo men (don’t we all) but I know there is truth to my experiences. Their analytical side comes through in the form of pickiness, picky eaters, picky at movies, picky at everything. And they combat this with sarcasm, or rather very dry humor that doesn’t always land. For the aforementioned reasons above, Virgo women are Classical Studies majors and Virgo men are Political Science majors. And no, I will not be taking questions. 

Libras are fair, and great at moral judgements. I mean, their symbol is the scales. History is a great major for them. For one, History is all about looking at the past and what went wrong. History often repeats itself. As a diplomatic and harmonious zodiac, it only makes since that Libras would want to have the knowledge to ensure a better future for everyone. 

Scorpios, to me, scream intense and passionate. Who else is intense and passionate? Accounting majors. You have to be super passionate about numbers and taxes to be an accountant. Especially if your goal is to work for a top 4 firm and wake up at 2 a.m. to go over spreadsheets. That is an intense job. You have to be firm and resourceful to be in the corporate world and Scorpios, quite frankly, are the perfect fit. 

English majors tend to choose English because they are huge book lovers. They love their alone time to ponder Jane Austen and Shakespeare, and always hope for the best at the end of a novel. That’s why Sagittarius would be an English major. They’re optimistic and independent, and love adventure. Whether that adventure be in the form of a New York Times Bestseller or a journalistic endeavor, they are along for the ride. 

The ever famous and always complicated Biochemistry and Molecular Biology major works so perfectly for Capricorns. Ambitious, disciplined, and determined, a lot of these majors come in wanting to be pre-med or specialize in research that requires grad school and many hours in the lab. On top of that, Capricorns thrive in a structured environment and there is no major more structured than BMB. 

Aquarius, the most identifiable of the water signs. Known for nuanced personalities, they are unique, creative, smart, and analytical. All of these traits combined work perfectly together in Philosophy. Aquarius is in touch with their emotions and flexible when it comes to different opinions and mindsets. They don’t mind discussing the multiple scenarios that may occur with a situation or the multiple different lenses to look at a text; in fact, they thrive off of it. Their originality prospers in the free-thinking philosophical world. 

Now my choice for Pisces may seem a little random, but hear me out. Pisces are imaginative, intuitive, emotionally intelligent, and supportive. Pisces is definitely a dance major. Dance is such an experimental and vulnerable major, from the choreography to the stories behind the art of dancing. Those who aren’t dancers but need to take a dance class for an ARTSC credit need to feel welcomed and free to be themselves in the class environment. Pisces are great at creating a space where creative freedom and emotional risks can be taken, otherwise how else would beautiful dance numbers be made?

As a whole, It’s hard to pigeonhole and stereotype the zodiacs into one specific major. Unpleased with what your zodiac or major is connected with? Well, maybe your rising sign or your moon sign aligns better with a major listed. Or just discount my opinion completely. If you do, I’ll know that you’re probably a Virgo man and/or a political science major. 

Sincerely,

Taylor Storlien