Mondays. Who invented them? …Why? Here at beloved Gustavus, we learn (hopefully) about the history of Western civilization and the development of our culture and perspective. If not, something’s up with where our money’s going. Since attending this hilltop haven, I’ve been blessed with a good handful of EXCELLENT MONDAYS! I beg of you, how does that happen? In my experience, it starts with a … Continue reading Mondays are not always horrible. They can be wonderful.

Seeing as earlier this week was the Nobel Conference, it would be appropriate to write an article about food. Appropriate, but maybe a little too obvious. Instead, I write here about another aspect of food: my dog and how much he loves it. My dog Bobber gets three meals a day, just like me. Two scoops in the bowl at breakfast, one scoop at first … Continue reading Do you miss your animal companion?

Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it. -Woody Allen Geez! You scared me. No, I can talk. I was just in the middle of something. I was doing nothing. It’s okay, I’ll finish later. Yeah, nothing. I’ve still got some to get through by dinnertime. See, it’s on my planner. I’ve always tried to allow some time for it, but … Continue reading The Zen of doing nothing

Here is the truth for pretty much 100 percent of college students: texts are coming in and going out at any time of the day or night, transmitting messages of both importance and absurdity; the cell phone could buzz at any time with an important phone call from a friend or a parent; practice times get changed, deadlines are extended, people break up—this is all … Continue reading I would give you a call if I could

Scott: “Damn I’m definitely procrastinating from starting this lab report, lol. MUST STAY FOCUSED.” Ashley: “Procrastinating sucks.” Amy: “Tryna stop procrastinating about this school workkk.” -Facebook I don’t even like saying that word. The “P” word. It’s been diluted with millions of whiny Facebook statuses and has become unfortunately tied to the tiny giggles that always seem to bookend its place in a sentence (“What … Continue reading Attack of the flying procastination monster

For those of you who have not ventured into the mystical other-world that is the Minnesota Renaissance Festival, please allow me to blow your mind: Ladies adorn themselves in velvet bodices and gowns, their bosoms bountiful and up to their chins. Men wear tights and tunics and carry a sword in one hand and a beer stein in the other. Wee little peasant children roll … Continue reading Forget historical accuracy. I just want a turkey leg.

It’s Sunday morning. You lie in bed, hugging the covers to yourself as you casually slip between dreams, punctuated by rolling from one side to the other. Your bed is warm, your blanket cozy and the room is still. Even the weather is collaborating with you; the overcast sky blocks the piercing rays of sunlight from your room. Eventually, you glance at your cell phone … Continue reading How hard must we try?

Four cupcakes out of five to Alex Legeros for his ponderings last week on the subject of liberal arts and the merit of CI. As a CII student, I throughly resonate with his encouraging words to take an art class, specifically drawing, at Gustavus. Last autumn, I learned how to express myself through said black and white medium, thanks to Professor Kris Lowe. I am … Continue reading What is it you plan to do with your one and precious life?

I walk around campus and am surrounded by butts. Butts in jeans, butts in skirts, butts in sweatpants. Butts everywhere! Normally I don’t mind a good back-side, some god blessed as more visually appealing than others. (I’m thinking about you, James Franco. Swoon!) What I don’t appreciate is the blatant misuse among ladies of the comfortable and versatile clothing item known as leggings. That being … Continue reading No, I don’t want to see your butt. Thanks anyway.