Girl dinner! Girl dinner! Girl dinner! Girl dinner!

Raquel Vaughn-

As the infamous TikTok sound goes, “This is my meal. I call this girl dinner.” And then we all sing “Girl dinner! Girl dinner!” as if it’s a praise to every woman who’s ever had a meal before us. “Girl dinner” is a phenomenon most famous on the social media app TikTok, and glorifies the simple fact that a girl has eaten. This type of dinner is known for its odd combination of foods that make up a meal and doesn’t actually have to be eaten during the typical dinner time. Girl dinner could be a left-over chicken leg, a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and the rest of the two-liter Sprite. Or it could be a combo of ramen noodles, grapes, that cookie you saved from your Subway meal, and a whole cucumber. Or, maybe girl dinner is just a single bagel with cream cheese.

There has been much speculation across the communities of TikTok and in some corners of Instagram about what girl dinner really is. Girl dinner is not five individual popped popcorn kernels. It’s also not a small bag of trail mix. It’s an eccentric assembly of foods that have no business being consumed in the same sitting.

I have a friend who once ate a dinner that consisted of a bag of Takis, reheated mashed potatoes, a Snickers ice cream bar, and two cans of Dr. Pepper. So it was not the most healthy meal. It definitely was not balanced, but it was food nonetheless. Girl dinner does not glorify how little one person has eaten, or whether or not the meal has the accurate measurement of each food category. It does, however, highlight the fact that a person has eaten. Girl dinner is not perfect and has never claimed to be. It’s not beautiful, logical, or even (sometimes) healthy.

Living on a campus with limited options for food is the perfect environment for obtaining girl dinner. Scrounging for food is actually one of the biggest elements of the girl dining experience. The rest of the pizza rolls in the freezer, your least favorite flavored sparkling water from the fridge (but you’ll drink it because it’s the only thing that’s there), an apple from the fruit bowl, canned tuna from the cupboard, and the stale Doritos kept in the top drawer of your nightstand is what makes girl dinner a feast fit for a warrior. With many factors such as the STEAMery now closing at 2:00 p.m. and the fact that I have yet to see General’s Chicken in the Caf, a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do. And that is to eat the most deranged meal and excuse it as girl dinner.

If you’re like me and you find yourself walking into the Caf at 7:30 p.m. with no clue of what to eat because the Wok is closed and the pasta is shriveled and dried-up, then I’ve got you covered. If the grill smells like Worst Cooks in America was being filmed in an American’s backyard on the Fourth of July, then here is some girl dinner inspiration to get you through those hard times.

My go-to girl dinner is an everything bagel that is toasted for exactly four minutes. But don’t stop there because while that’s in the toaster, you grab a plate and head straight for the salad bar. There I recommend getting cucumbers, celery, and your choice of fruit. If your only choices are between pineapple and honeydew, you always choose pineapple. If it’s honeydew and cantaloupe, then you always choose cantaloupe. But if you ever find yourself choosing between grapes, watermelon, or strawberries, then just give up and put all three on your plate. Once you get your vegetables and fruit, get your cream cheese and then your choice of drink (for me, Pibb Xtra because Gustavus doesn’t have Dr. Pepper or, if I’m tight on money, just water). By this time, if you’ve acted like you have all the time in the world roaming the Marketplace, your bagel should be done toasting. Put your bagel on your plate, grab a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos on the way to the register, and then enjoy your girl dinner. It’s quick and cheap!

I’ve asked other students on campus what their favorite girl dinner is and I received some interesting answers.

Junior Morgan Kelly’s favorite girl dinner is a combination of crackers and cheese with a choice of grapes and apples. It’s small and something that could pass as a snack. But girl dinner is not a snack, it’s something that you devour. A few crackers with cheese is an afternoon lunch you eat while gossiping with your friends on the patio. An entire tray of crackers with cheese prepared entirely for one’s own self is a valid girl dinner. Especially if you are munching on it in front of a showing of your favorite YouTuber.

Girl dinner isn’t just about the food, but also about how much it is. One singular bagel is only girl dinner if it’s quite literally the only thing you can find to eat. But more realistically, at least two to three bagels would be considered a meal fit for a girl. When I asked another student about what their favorite selection is, she perfectly captured the essence of what girl dinner is all about. She said two dozen cold mozzarella sticks and four hard-boiled eggs. It’s not beautiful or logical, but it’s food so therefore it is girl dinner. Another go-to meal comes from Sophomore Lupe Olague: Chicken with short noodle pasta and a salad with tomatoes, cheese, and Caesar salad dressing. Olague’s girl dinner is filling, quick, and easy.

Girl dinner is for the girls. It’s exclusively nutritious, even when it’s not, and only plays by the rules that the girlies have established. It’s not beautiful, even though it tries to be, and it doesn’t make sense. But a girl’s gotta eat.

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