In this modern era, with a recession firmly beating down our country’s morale, it is no surprise that people across the nation are turning to the things that comfort them. For some people this means turning to friends and family, and for others it’s community. Still others turn to their churches and other escapes for an infusion of hope. Because of this, I think it is time for our nation to add another national holiday to our calendars—an unconventional holiday—a Chipotday.
Some of you who have had the misfortune of being in a class with me have likely heard about Chipotday. I’ve been a bit of an evangelizer of sorts this last semester. However, I feel it is time to take the Chipotday movement to a campus- and eventually nation-wide level. Considering the emotional state of our nation, I think we could all use a little more Chipotday.
As college students, we have a duty to pioneer new and more interesting ways to have fun. I believe Chipotday might be the avenue by which we can succeed in this manner.
But, I’m getting ahead of myself. What is Chipotday? I’ve already alluded to the fact that it is a holiday, but what sort of holiday is it? Simply put, all Chipotday entails is going to Chipotle and eating tasty things. However, this doesn’t quite capture the entire picture, because Chipotday is the greatest holiday known to humankind and much too great to be described so simply. It is a synthesis of the ideals of every other holiday that we celebrate brought to the next level through the addition of burritos (or tacos).
How is it that these ideals are brought to the next level? Here are some examples: Christmas is (whether you think it ought to be or not) about giving gifts; Chipotday is about giving the gift of tastiness. Both Mother’s Day and Father’s Day are about respecting your elders; Chipotday is about respecting your elders by occasionally allowing them to come along and have some guac. The Fourth of July is about honoring our country’s independence; Chipotday is about honoring our independence by saying to the rest of the world, “We like eating large burritos with rice!” Valentine’s Day is about sharing your love; Chipotday is about sharing your love of tastiness. These are only a few examples, but I can say with relative certainty that there is no holiday that can ever beat Chipotday at awesomeness.
Furthermore, unlike other holidays, which are once-a-year affairs that bring about possible scheduling and family difficulties, Chipotday takes place every Friday. If you miss it one week, your friends and family will certainly be disappointed, but there is always next week. Also, due to the fact that Chipotday is a weekly occurrence, there is no “let-down” of the sort that people experience the day after Christmas when they realize that they must wait an entire year to spend money they don’t have and eat too many chocolates. Chipotday is only ever a week away; therefore, the day after Chipotday is only ever a happy day.
Chipotday, because of its delicious nature, is particularly poised to bring our nation together in these difficult times. There is no religious requirement in order to observe Chipotday, no exclusive list of the privileged who are allowed into Chipotle. Over burritos, we can forget the disagreements and differences that we have had in the past by sharing in tasty things. In this sense, guacamole is the cure for all our society’s problems.
To take this in a more practical direction, it is important to note that Chipotle, and in extension Chipotday, promotes local and drug-free foods which will in turn make our American farmers and ranchers more prosperous. So in a sense, this most awesome of holidays would be capable of ensuring a delicious local food source for Americans nationwide. Aside from its association with Coca-Cola and a previous controlling interest held by McDonalds (which has been divested since 2006), Chipotle is a bastion of forward-thinking, environmentally-conscious food service practices. Also, it’s tasty.
In short, I’m pretty sure that Chipotday can solve our current financial crisis and raise the morale in this country like no other holiday can.
May the Burrito bless you, and keep you; May the Guacamole make its face to shine upon you; May the Cilantro turn its countenance to you and grant you peace.